fishes and Plates
by Ferdinand with Flowers
Summary: Simple pleasures. Aren't they the worst thing God wrought on man? /Akihiko and Jenpei centic-friendship/


Water's running from the faucet. Down down.

Cleaning lady's gone, vacation off the coast of Honolulu. Told her to bring them back lots of gifts they did. Bring leis and a tiki goddess or two, Ken says sand cause I collect it.

Today is Akihiko's turn to wash the dishes, but ain't his nose wrinkled in disgust. The dishes are piled up on high, revolting leftover food melding together with each other and the water to turn into a sort of sewage sludge. So much filth and so much.

A sigh. He really does not want to do this. But he has to because the chore wheel that Mitsuru assigned their merry little band decreed him to. Trading in leather gloves for pure, one-hundred percent plastic ones and slipping the cleaning lady's pink-polkadoted 1950's apron over his neck, he rushes in on an all out attack on this ceramic menace.

Sponge goes splosh. Siddle saddle.

Rinse, wring a rag.

Missed a spot here. Missed a spot there

_Oh my God, that's disgusting. Who does that?  
Did that just wink at me?  
God, I'm gonna barf!_

Hold on Akihiko, hold on. Stack of clean plates besides him are shimmering with whiteness, and the business is still growing.

_You are almost done.  
Almost  
There._

Kitchen door opens. A chuckle. A blood vessel almost bursts in Akihiko's head when Junpei enters with a stack of newly gritted dishes. He looks like a waiter with those plates stacked on high to the sky.

**Hey, hey, you're here. Dude, can you wash these for me?**

_What the hell, you bastard?  
I'm just about finished here  
And you come in with this?_

Akihiko puts a gloved hand on his polkadoted hip. Junpei rolls his eyes behind the stack.

_And besides  
Where did all  
Those dishes come from?_

**Don't worry about it. Just wash them**

_I  
will  
not._

They are glaring daggers at each other.

And shreeeeeew, the water is still going down down.

_Hey you dirty  
Your dish, you  
Wash your dish._

**Is this the circle of life or what? You still have dirty dishes to wash in the sink anyways. How's about I just drop them in the sink?**

_No I'm going to wash the  
Leftover dishes I have and you  
Are going to stand there_

_And wait for  
Your turn to wash the dishes  
You are holding._

**Man, I'm not gonna stand here and wait for you to finish! That's BS! **Phoenix Ranger Featherman R **is on! **

Goofy grin. Akihiko hates that goofy grin.

**I'm just gonna drop them in the sink.**

Clink clatter go the plates in his grasp as Junpei takes a few steps forward on the tiled floor.

_Drop them  
and I swear I'll  
throw them at you._

Akihiko's holding a sponge at Junpei like how an assassin would hold a banana, cruel and mystical and just plain stupid. He uses his body to block Junpei's way to the sink.

Junpei gets a bright idea for once in his life. Akihiko sees it when Junpei's face is lit aglow.

A matter of quick steps, a lighting fast clink clatter, and Junpei stacks the dirty dishes atop the pile of clean ones. Akihiko is standing stunned, blue sponge in his directed grip limping over, cause he never thought of that.

Before he could say anything, Jenpei's out the door, not even bothering to look back.

A sigh. Akihiko places his hand on his hip as he looks at the stack of clean dishes intermixed with the dirty ones. Not only does he have to clean Junpei's set, but he also has to add that one clean plate the last dirty plate of the set touched. That's just one more plate he didn't have to clean just a second ago.

And dammit, didn't he say that **Phoenix Ranger Featherman R** is on? Akihiko can't miss that.

But, oh well. Too bad. Glumly, he separates the clean plates from the dirty ones, not forgetting that one clean plate the dirty plate had corrupted with its lame touch.

Sponge goes splosh. Siddle saddle.

Rinse, wring a rag.

Missed a spot here. Missed a spot there.

Hold on Akihiko, hold on.

* * *

(Oh, my God, you smart bastard. You just used script format and made it all nasty pretty! No, I take it all back, it's beautifully ugly.)

disclaimer  
and  
(Even though this is higly experimental and most flaws are made intentionally) concrit (Is still) greatly appreciated


End file.
